Your Thought Are Holding You Back
Why don’t you have what you say you want? Why have you not achieved the goals you set out to achieve? Because somewhere, deep down inside, you don’t believe in your ability to make it happen. You don’t trust that you will follow through on what you need to do to get the results you want. You have stories about why it is not possible for you.
You have limiting beliefs or self-doubt that are holding you back.
And those limiting beliefs or self-doubt show up in your life as excuses, justifications complaining, comparing, and procrastination.
Excuses: I don’t know how to do that. I don’t have the money. I’m so busy. My kids… My husband… My boss… I’m too old. I don’t have experience. I’m not organized. I don’t even know where to start.
Complaining: Nothing good ever happens for me. Stuff always happens to me. It is always something. I never catch a break.
Comparing: She knows people. She is just lucky. Well, if I had people helping me.
Procrastination: I will do ___ when I lose weight. When the kids are out of the house… When I have more money… When things settle down… I have to find the time.
You may think your reasons are legitimate factual statements. But they are just stories you tell yourself, stories you have probably been telling yourself for years, so you absolutely believe they are true.
But have you ever stopped and questioned these thoughts? What if I did have time? How can I make the time? Where can I find the information I need? What is the first logical step? What if I don’t have to have the experience to try it? What if I go for it now and don’t worry about things settling down? What if I make my own breaks? What can I control?
The key to overcoming these beliefs is shifting your mindset. You have to practice thinking new expansive thoughts on purpose.
And I know that you are thinking, “T, I can’t just change my thoughts, and ta-da, I can do great things.”
But I’m here to tell you that yes, that is absolutely where it STARTS. You have to be open to what is possible, and then you have to be willing to be uncomfortable while you try and be willing to fail—a few times.
It is a process. It will take time and effort to first change your thoughts and then change your actions. But that is how transformation happens.
If the only thing you tell yourself is, “I’ll never be able to do___.” Your brain will never work on trying to figure out how it might be possible; it will only look for evidence that reinforces your belief.
But if you think, I wonder how I can make that happen; then you have just cracked open the door to possibility. And one idea will creep in through the crack, pushing the door open a little more, and the next idea will come along, pushing the door even more. Then before you know it, the door is wide open, and you can see all of the possibilities that are just waiting to be ushered in.
Next week I'll show you how to identify and clean up your thoughts.